Robert Prevost backs down and changes his name to “Papa Johns”

Santa Pizzeria.- In an effort to redeem what would have been a lost historic opportunity, Cardinal Prevost has just changed his name to “Papa Johns.”

Although the Camerlengo had already introduced the new Pope as “Leo XIV,” he decided, at the last minute, to change it to “Johns,” taking advantage of his American nationality.

Daddy Yankee Papamerican

Papa John's

Whatever you want to call it…

— Rick 🇲🇽 (@Ricmarmex) May 9, 2025

The new Pope is proud to be a gringo

"I was meditating deeply... and then I saw a promotion for a family pizza with a free soda. I understood that this was the path God was showing me," the Supreme Pontiff confessed, now with his new name on his official Vatican badge.

Now Pope John explained that his election seeks to modernize the image of the Church: “We already had Leo, John Paul, Benedict… why not something tastier?” he exclaimed while putting ground chili on his pizza.

Pope Leo XIV celebrated his first (novus ordo) Mass in Latin. God bless the Supreme Pontiff. pic.twitter.com/VkdrP0MtPn

— Get to Know Love and Live Your Faith with Luis Roman (@ConoceF) May 9, 2025

The Holy See has denied that the change in name has anything to do with the pizza trucks that have been unloading pizza through the entrance to the Sistine Chapel, and instead asserted that it is a personal decision of the anointed one.

“No, I named myself 'Johns' after the apostle 'John', ahem, don't think I'm doing it to get pizzas,” Prevost explained, wiping the sweat from his forehead.

Likewise, it is ruled out that the new Pontiff will begin appointing cardinals with nicknames like "Don Pepperoni I" or "Cardinal Mozzarella," although we will have to wait and see how his papal bulls are issued.

And in case you missed it : Paty Cantú was at the Deforma offices and even gave a private concert.

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